Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Action Plan?

Last night I fell down the basement stairs carrying a box of books and pictures frames in preparation of converting my guest room into my home office for my new job.  I slipped on something I left on the side of the stairs and skidded down them on my back dropping the box with a loud crash and sending pieces of glass everywhere.  I hurt my back and it's sore today. I'm okay but it scared the shit out of me.  The twins were asleep two floors up with their door closed.  I was in my PJs and didn't have my phone on me.  What if I really hurt myself and couldn't move?  It would be a good twelve hours before anyone missed me.   

I lived alone for twelve years before the twins came and didn't give this a second thought.  Now that they're here, everything is different including me trying to take better care of myself for them. (and being less careless!)

I know it's impossible to predict something bad happening and the reality is something really bad could happen at any time.  How does one take precautions for their children just in case?  Is it possible?  Do any of you have any kind of check-in/action plan in place?  I'm not talking about a will (although I still need to finalize that).  I'm talking about an immediate need for help when you can't get to a phone.  This time of year I don't see my neighbors much.  I doubt they would notice if my car didn't leave the garage one morning.  My thoughts are all over the place today.  I think this back pain is making me nuts...

Monday, February 25, 2013

Thank you for the supportive comments on my last post.  I have a new job and start in two weeks!  I will be working from home and am very excited!

Friday, February 22, 2013

Potential Opportunity!

Last week I had two job interviews.  TWO.  With two different companies.  This week I have had two more interviews with one of those companies.  Over the past year I have had a handful of call backs for new positions, mostly from recruiters with jobs that either still entailed on-call/after hours work or that didn't pay enough for me to keep my house. 

Last week was the first actual in-person interview I've had since the one I had for my current job almost two years ago. 

I've been reluctant to say much to anyone about these possible opportunities because of the whole jinx factor.  The jinx factor was strong for me when TTC and, as silly as it might be, it has carried on to other parts of my life too.  But I can't keep quiet.  I might get an official offer TODAY from one of these positions! 

I would take either one of these jobs if offered to me and the one I haven't heard back from and that is slow moving likely doesn't pay as much as I would like/need.  I don't know the exact salary but they are a not-for-profit and when asking me my desired range, indicated that it was "slightly" high.  (But she said slightly like 3 times so I don't think slightly describes it.)

I'm sitting at my current job (with very little to do) writing this post and willing my cell phone to ring.  I've spoke with the two owners and the sales person and the person I would be reporting to spoke to one of my references yesterday and indicated they were very close to making me an offer.  This potential position would be a work-from-home opportunity with another software company.  They seemed pretty anxious to fill this new role for their growing-fast company and I would be thrilled to be able to tender my resignation and 2-week notice here today.  Thrilled. 

  • If this was to work out, I would no longer be required to be on-call the week of March 18th which would be through my birthday.
  • If this was to work out, I would no longer be required to be on-call for the weeks of Memorial Day and Christmas and I would no longer be the back-up on-call person for the week of the 4th of July.
  • If this was to work out, I would no longer work one evening shift per week plus one Friday night per month in which Awesome Sitter has to pick up the boys from daycare.
  • If this was to work out, I would no longer be required every 4 weeks to be on tap for middle-of-the-night-come-into-the-office software installs that no one told me about at my interviews.
  • If this was to work out, on my lunch breaks from home I could take my shower, do laundry, pick-up the house, and even run to the grocery store saving a ton of evening time spent doing these chores.  Evening time much better spent with the twins or sleeping!
  • If this was to work out, when the boys start school in a few years, getting them on and off the school bus might be easier.
Now before you think that I might be being petty about the on-call stuff since that is not uncommon in my field, let me explain the abuse of on-call that this company has.  On-call for this company means required weekend non-emergency work.  It means maintenance procedures that should/could be performed by other departments.  It means non-emergency administrative stuff that can easily be done during normal business hours.  To me, on-call should be emergency issues only: keep the customer running, answer customer calls, work customer high priority issues.  Only.  I was the only person on-call for my last job 24/7.  I did do some things from home after hours but I had a big window of time in which to complete them and the emergency stuff where I had to go in on a weekend or at night was rare because it was for true emergencies only.  Here, documentation (for statistics purposes and analysis) is required to be completed during off-hours.  A friend of mine who is a long-time partner for a consulting firm agrees - this is not what on-call should be.

If this was to work out, I might actually start to feel productive again and be happier and less stressed.

If either of these jobs works out, it would be a very good thing.  Stay tuned!

Monday, February 11, 2013

MeAndBaby Bits

  • The twins have been in daycare for 6 weeks.  And they love it.  And I love that they love it.  On day 2, the Dynamo pooped ON THE POTTY at school.  That happened before any pee on the potty took place and before any real talk of potty training at home took place.  I have had little potty chairs in our bathrooms for some time and both boys have sat on them in their clothes but really that had been it.  They both have now randomly pooped and peed on the potty at school and the Dynamo has now pooped and peed in his little potty at home.  This was a nice early bonus of daycare as I did not expect to be doing any potty training until at least Spring.
  • My mom is definitely moving.  And it's happening this weekend.  I'm sad that the boys are losing time with their Grandma but happy for my mom.  That's all I can say about this right now.
  • Work still sucks.  As in really sucks.  The after-hours rotation (and by after hours I mean in-the-middle-of-the-night for several hours) schedule has picked up as we have lost people in our department.  There is now the potential for some after hours event to take place for me every 3 to 4 weeks.  The anxiety I feel over this is extreme.  I've talked to my supervisor and the head of our department since this was not explained to me when I started employment.  Those chats have not gotten me too far. I have been actively looking for something new.  I think this will likely get worse before it gets better.  I'm trying to control the stress I am feeling from this worry so it doesn't affect the boys.
  • The boys are still doing well with speech therapy.  They are in session two times per week with their therapist now going to their daycare. 
  • One of the infant teachers at daycare commented how the boys look like me.  I told her I don't often hear that - I usually hear that one does and one does not (see this post).  She asked if Sweet Potato looks like his dad.  Instead of just saying yes which is sort of true since he has the characteristics of the donor and sort of not true since I do not consider the donor their dad, I told her and anyone else in earshot how I used an anonymous donor but Sweet Potato did have the same traits as the donor and so well, yes, the answer to her question was yes.  And then I apologized for over-sharing when, in fact, I'm not sorry but want them to know the boys' story as I am open about it.  It was slightly awkward as I was rambling on like I am here.  The teacher was great about it and said something like they hear a lot of stories and sharing was fine with them.  Or something. 
  • Toddlerhood is hard.  Age almost two-and-a-half is either more difficult than infanthood or I suppressed that past time in our lives and just don't remember it.  There are pockets of easier times like when the boys play nicely together and I can step out of the room but, as a whole, meeting both of their needs (sometimes at the same time) is overwhelming.  I'm trying to let other things go more - like the need to make sure the house is picked up all the time - in favor of spending quality, happy time with my kids. Along with that, I need and want more support.  I'm not really a joiner but I've been looking around a bit online for SMC and other single parent groups.  I can't seem to find anything local that appears to be current.